These are some of Richard's thoughts from his reading of Dad's patriarchal blessing.

November 21, 2010

Notes on reading Dad's patriarchal blessing today - - -

I began thinking about the point in life in which he received his blessing - March 8, 1953.

• He was one month shy of his 35th birthday.
• He was just eight years from the battle of Okinawa, which started in April, 1945. You may well recall that the battle was so brutal (as were all of the Pacific battles) that the planners for the invasion of Japan estimated that America would suffer over a million casualties, and the Japanese several million. This estimate led to the decision to drop the atomic bomb, twice, rather than suffer such losses.
• Interestingly, I have recently 'read' two books about battles in the Pacific, "Flags of Our Fathers" (Iwo Jima), and "With the Old Breed at Peleliu and Okinawa" by E.B. Sledge.
• Rachael's son, Ryan, has a strong interest in WWII, and recommended "Flags" to me. I listened to it as I commute back and forth to Provo every day. I finished it last week.
• "With the Old Breed" was lent to me by my bishop sometime in the summer. He remembered that our dad had fought in the Pacific. What he did not know was that these are two of the battles he fought in.
• Peleliu was fought in Sep-Nov, 1944, Iwo Jima Feb-March, 1945, and Okinawa, as I said earlier started in April, 1945. (I think it might have been Good Friday.)
• Peleliu was so brutal that those troops could not be part of the Iwo Jima battle—and maybe were never planned to be. But, that's why dad was not at Iwo Jima.
• Both of these books make clear the awful circumstances of the fighting in the Pacific. All war is awful, but America had never before seen anything like the Japanese. They gladly fought to the death. Surrender was not an option for them. And they were constrained by nothing in their way of fighting and killing.
• Anyway, that's a long story to get to the point that dad must have had some brain-searing experiences as he fought - and it was just eight years later that he was getting his patriarchal blessing.
• (Have I told you my story of playing golf on Okinawa 23 years after dad was there?)
• He had the blessing in the Detroit stake. I wonder if we were living over the slaughter house?
• I was nine and would be ten in October. The other children were: Leslie, Donna, Christine, Scott, with Sara as the baby born the previous November.

I am coming to realize that I hardly knew my father and mother. This is partly a function of the natural divide between parents and children, part of it is the difficulty succeeding generations have in communicating with each other (because of their different life experiences, and therefore their perspectives), and part of it is disinterest on the part of the children.

Even in our adulthood, who among us ever thought to sit with mom and dad and have a serious conversation (or series of conversations) about their life's experiences, who they were, who they thought they were, their dreams - realized and not, their hopes for their children, and so forth?

We have missed a great deal, which we might be able to restore in the next life, but which would be so nice to have now.

We could ask our children to have such an interest in us, but you can't force such a perspective.

So, what is to be done? Probably nothing.

Thanks to Leslie for the memories and the thoughts.

Love,

Dick and Dad

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